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This text has been translated by auto-translation. There may be a slight difference between the original text and the translation. (Original Language: 日本語)

Why do people do moral harassment? The surprising truth is …

Moral harassment （ There are a wide variety of reasons for perpetrators of moral harassment ） but what reasons do you imagine?

Perhaps you think of them as "bossy" because they are "bossy", "overconfident", or "look down on others".

Of course, such an image is not wrong. However, what is surprisingly unknown is the "weak" side of the harasser.

Today, I will tell you five characteristics of the harasser including such a weak side.

① The Desire to Control

The harasser tries to gain a sense of superiority and security by dominating and controlling the other person.
This means, on the flip side, that they need to control people to feel superior and secure.
In other words, the moralizing appears as a way of coping with instability and uncertainty of the self.

② Insecurity and inferiority of self

People with internal insecurity and inferiority tend to try to enhance their self-worth by putting others down.
This is a kind of defense mechanism to distract from one's own problems.
For example, a husband who failed his college entrance exams and did not get into a top university may lash out at his wife, who graduated from a less prestigious university than him,
saying things like, "You are stupid.

③ The family environment in which they were raised

has no small influence on their past experiences.
For example, if one's father is a harasser of his mother, the probability that his son will become a harasser husband is much higher.
From an early age, they learn the wrong kind of marital relationship, and naturally learn that it is okay for husbands to be bossy with their wives, and that it is okay to subdue their wives with abusive language and behavior.
Also, people who grew up with abusive parents may not resolve the trauma and may express it as their own moral harassment.

④ Socio-cultural influences
In some societies and cultures, dominant behavior and control of others is a symbol of "strength," and this can encourage moralizing behavior.
Without fear of prejudice, I can tell you from my past experience that, for example, construction workers
still have a workplace culture where language is abusive and senior workers strictly supervise junior workers.

Also, people in professions called "teachers," such as lawyers and doctors, often have a tendency to be moral harassers.
Lawyers, in particular, have to mount their opponents.
So, even at home, they mistakenly think that they are great and that they are teachers.

⑤ Lack of Emotional Control
Some people say that harassers act very calmly and do not "lose their temper ・ ・" or "lose their temper ・ ・" He says that he never does this.
However, it often feels as if the harasser lacks the ability to properly control his or her emotions and tries to vent them by directing anger and frustration at others.

Nowadays, a harasser can be a victim or a perpetrator itself, regardless of gender.
I suggest that you take another look at your own marital relationship.

Our center offers an on line phone consultation （ which you can feel free to use, for 2750 yen per 30 minutes ）.

If you would like to talk to someone about your marital relationship, please search

ID "@adr-center"

and apply for counseling.